I first recognized “Pink” while I was living in Mexico with my husband and son. My husband was building a glass factory and so we were going to be living there for about 14 months.
We had been there for at least 6 months at this point. My dear husband had been working many, many long hours on site, and my girlfriends had all left for their summer vacations, so I was feeling pretty darned lonely, frustrated, angry and defensive which is not the way I wanted to be spending my life, especially trying to raise a young, impressionable child. I was frustrated because I felt like I “should” being doing something else, what that was I didn’t know. I was angry because I was frustrated and I was defensive because I felt guilty for not being content with what I had, which was a FREAKING AWESOME LIFE! The front part of my brain knew that I “should be happy” but there was a nagging discontent that was making me short-tempered, irritable and snappy. I wasn’t happy and my attitude was poisoning my life. I knew something had to change, I just didn’t know what.
I was taking my walk, when I noticed the sky. There were just enough clouds on the horizon to create one of those picture-perfect sunsets with yellow rays of sunlight shining through hot pink clouds against an apricot sky. Stunning, really stunning.
It was then that I felt a feeling of lightness. Like a marionette, I could feel the sunset pulling all the tension and pain off of my shoulders.
I was wearing an MP3 player and the song playing at that very moment was Pink by Aerosmith.
I was speechless, floating along the street, listening to Steven Tyler sing…
“And I think everything is going to be all right, no matter what we do tonight” and I got it. I totally understood just what exactly it was that I was supposed to learn.
I could hold onto my loneliness, anger, frustration and defensiveness and continue to feel horrible.
Or I could let it go, even for just a few moments and feel better. The choice was completely up to me! Amazing! I had to be strong enough to surrender and let it all go. I had to have enough faith in myself and the Universe to figure out what it was I really needed, as well as, the patience and determination to go out and get it. Essentially, I had to let my life become something different, something better.
I started by taking control of my attitude. Doing this allowed me to develop appreciation for my life. It hasn’t happened all at once, but it HAS happened. Just like muscles are strengthened by regular use, I had to practice living joyfully day to day. I had to go out and find the Pink things. As a matter of fact, I started creating art (making Pink things ) to represent my gratitude for the Pink things in my life. The piece at the top of this essay was just the first of many projects I’ve made to say THANK YOU to the Universe. I built up my happiness muscles and I USE them!
God wants me to be happy. She’ll throw out clues to remind me. It’s my job to look for them.
Pink is my reminder of why life is worth living. It’s a naturally occurring phenomenon produced by the Universe. Like a birthday present, it’s wrapped up in the mundane events of daily life just waiting to be opened.
Like the soft, pink of baby toes,
and the light-hearted earnestness of “Octopuses Garden” by the Beatles,
my son’s laughter,
and my husband’s smile,
the sexiness of Steven Tyler singing “Pink”,
and the hot, pink flowers on a bougainvillea vine,
the resilient attitude of SpongeBob SquarePants,
and the warm, buzzing feeling in my muscles after an intense work-out,
Pink reminds me that my happiness is completely up to me and I can unwrap it whenever I want to.
That day transformed my life. I love my life and feel so very blessed. I admit, there are days that are difficult, some of which are downright painful. Sometimes I look around and don’t see anything Pink.
I finally realized what it is I am supposed to be doing. I have to be the Pink thing, the reminder of why life is beautiful and worth living.
“Wait!” you say. “How can you be so unrealistic? Real life is hard, difficult and filled with dissappointment. Aren’t you sticking your head in the sand with all of this Pink crap? Aren’t your afraid of being made a fool of?”
Thanks for asking and I’m really glad you’re here. Without you, I would just be talking to myself and that would be really boring.
Let me be more specific about what I think Pink means.
Pink is my way to describe an overall-workable scheme to create a life worth looking forward to, as well as looking back upon. Pink is about momentum, not about perfection.
Let me offer three ideas that really help develop the philosophy of Pink;
desire, equanimity and resilience.
Desire is a very powerful force. Desire doesn’t sit in the corner waiting to be fulfilled. Desire pushes and prods relentlessly. Like a hungry cat rubbing around your legs, desire gets noticed, dammit!
Equanimity is the relationship in your life between what is happening to you and what you are doing about it. For example, if you spend every day of the week making chocolate chip cookies, you may become a very good baker, but you will not become a Kung Fu Master. Basically, you become what you do everyday.
Resilience is the ability to bounce back after hardship. You practice resilience by getting back up again, and again……and again……….
“You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing that we call ‘failure’ is not the falling down, but the staying down.” ~ Mary Pickford
Pink is the combination of all three of these. Pink is not afraid of what everyone else thinks. Pink wants to be noticed and appreciated. Pink has something better to offer than fear. Pink promises fulfillment. Pink is beautiful, funny, inspiring, strong, joyful, soothing and confident. Pink ROCKS!!
I hope that you will go out and look for the Pink things in your life. Even if your Pink things arePurple, Turquoise, or Neon Green, they long for your attention and want to inspire you.
The best part is that once you find them, everyone benefits!
John Lennon and the Beatles said it best when they sang “And in the end. The love you take, is equal to the love you make.”
May peace be with you and keep you safe and happy.
Pam Belding
p.s. Paula Pryke has a new book called”Simply Pink” and it is GORGEOUS!
The name of this project is Denim. I made it using a frame a girlfriend gifted me from her basement (Thanks Jen!), some muslin I dyed scarlet, American burlap (as opposed to Mexican jute which I love and hope to get more of,…. hint, hint), and my husbands jeans after I went at them with a pair of scissors. (What a treat!!) One of his belt buckles shows off the in-seam, while I used a needle and thread to sew on the waist band.
This is one of my oldest projects, dating back to 2005. Having carried back and forth to Art shows and Craft fairs, it has become one of my most favorite, as well as the many people who have commented on it.
After moving back home from Brasil, I am now becoming acquainted with my Michigan home all over again ( cue “Reunited“). This project lives in my dining room, (along with a lot of others) and I found myself staring at it the other day.
This project really helps showcase the answer to the question “What is the difference between change and transformation?”
Anyone can change their pants. That doesn’t change who they are. It doesn’t even change the pants.
Transformation takes time, tools and vision. It requires development and focus.
Think about a Thanksgiving turkey. First thing in the morning, before it has been cooked, a turkey is just a dead, cold, slimy, heavy thing with removable guts. ick!!
It’s Monday, which means time for the Inspirational song of the week.
My family and I have been back home in Michigan for almost 4 days now, and I must admit to being absolutely thrilled! WOOOHOOOOO!!!!! Baby, I couldn’t be happier if I were twins! ;P On my walk this morning I heard this song and almost skipped down the street…..arms swinging….singing along! I want everyone to feel like this!!!!
Have a most awesome week! xoxoxoxoxooxox
Pam
p.s. I heart Harry!!! ;P
Harry Connick Jr.
Miscellaneous
A Wink And A Smile
I remember the days of just keeping time
Of hanging around in sleepy town
Forever back roads empty for miles
Well you can’t have a dream and cut it to fit
But when I saw you I knew
We’d go together, like a wink and a smile
Leave your old jalopy by the railroad track
We’ll get a hip double-dip hip Topy two seat Pontiac
So you can rev her up, don’t go slow
It’s only green lights and all rights
Let’s go together like a wink and a smile
Give me a wink and a smile
We go together like a wink and a smile
Now my heart is music, such a simple song
Sing it again the notes never end this is where I belong
Just the sound of your voice the light in your eyes
They’re so far away from yesterday
Together like a wink and a smile
We go together like a wink and a smile
[ Harry Connick Jr. Lyrics are found on www.songlyrics.com ]
My family had been living in Tatui, Brasil since June of 2008, until last Wednesday the 29th of July. After just a few days of packing and cleaning, we all moved back home to Michigan.
Well, not all of us. Our cat, Simba, really hates to travel. He managed to escape at the last minute and run and hide in the roof of my neighbor’s churrasco (barbeque). I climbed the wall and looked inside the hole he dissappeared into. The neighbor lady and I spent half an hour begging and pleading him to come out. I even sat patiently and quietly by the hole for ten minutes. Finally, an hour late, we had to leave for the drive to Sao Paolo. With assurances from my neighbor that she would keep an eye out for him and feed him, we reluctantly got in the shuttle bus to go to the airport.
We are heart-broken. Simba had been a part of our family for 4 years and he was the perfect cat. He didn’t bite or scratch. He didn’t ruin the furniture with his claws and he never peed on anything. He was a wonderful cuddler and loved to snuggle up to our bellies and just spend time with us. He even put up with “upside down cat” when my husband would turn him upside down and rub his belly! He loved us and we loved him.
The 2 hours it took us to get the the airport went by in a blur of tears and tissues. My son asked why we had to lose Simba. I couldn’t answer him right away. I just said something about making sacrifices and then kept crying with him.
The rest of the travel went very smoothly. Our dog, Tootsie did her time in the crate, travelling as cargo in the belly of the airplanes. We picked her up in Cleveland and she was sitting up in her crate, waiting expectantly for us to come get her. (This was her second time travelling like this, so she knew we would.) We then packed her, her crate, and our 5 monster suitcases into the rental SUV and then drove 4 hours home to Ortonville, Michigan. After 30 hours of travel, we finally arrived home safe and sound and completely worn out.
The next morning I awoke fairly early and took out my journal. I needed to work out in my head, just what it was I was suppose to learn from losing the cat. I believe God does things for a reason, so I went looking for that reason by writing in my journal. After 3 pages, it came to me that the loss of our beloved cat was God’s way of encouraging me to focus on what I still have and to really appreciate having it. I didn’t want to lose him, and I’m sure he doesn’t want to lose us either, but he didn’t want to be stuck in the cat carrier more. He chose to stay in Brasil. Although it hurts, ( and yes, it still does and it probably will for a while longer) losing him amplified the wonderful adventure we had, the strong, healthy family we still are, and the closing of one chapter leading into the next. If he is meant to come back to live with us, I will take him back in a heart-beat. Like I said, he is the perfect cat. But for now, I just have to thank God for the time we had with him, and have faith that he will be safe and healthy in Brasil. We have many more adventures ahead of us to look forward to.
Good-bye Simba. God be with you and watch over you. You will be missed.
After living in Tatui, in the state of Sao Paolo in Brasil, my family and I are packed up and ready to move back home to Michigan.
This has brought with it many heartfelt good-byes, tears and “of course, I’ll keep in touch. You have my e-mail, right?”
Sitting down to dinner a couple of nights ago, my husband and I were talking with our son about all of the people and things we would miss about Brasil, as well as all of the things we are looking forward to when we go back home.
The best way to describe the feeling associated with this time in our lives is
Bittersweet: pleasure mingled with pain or regret: the bittersweet of parting.
We have had the pleasure of meeting some truly wonderful people here in Brasil, who have made our time here most enjoyable.
Just to name a few; Egle, Lida, Ana Paula, Marcella, Heather, Eliu, Austin, Evan, Braden, Carson, Christiane, Gyro, Leticia, Enrique, Simone, Roberta, Guillerme, and Penha.
We will never forget the fun we had here. We will miss all of our friends.
I pass these flowers every day on my walk around the perimeter of my neighborhood, here in Brasil. On the day that I took this photo, I was particularly struck by the vibrancy of these flowers. Their petals took on an extraordinary significance and my finger longed to reach up and touch them. The small, yellow orchids behind the larger, white ones practically screamed for my attention.
That’s when the realization hit me.
The menacing sky in the background encouraged me to focus my attention upon the beautiful blossoms right in front of me. Although I passed these flowers everyday, the intensity of their charm wasn’t truly apparent until I saw them contrasted against the threat of the oncoming storm.
It was an epiphany!
Life is going to be hard sometimes and it’s during these times when the truth is revealed.
What really matters is the focus of my attention. Although it’s important to recognize the approaching storm and prepare accordingly, I can’t allow my fear to blind me to the amazing splendor of life. Instead, I choose to use that fear as an amplifier, a distinguishing feature of the landscape, a contrast to better accentuate the beauty along my path.
So with this knowledge, I choose to focus on the beautiful.
I will recognize the challenge of the difficulty as an opportunity to see the extraordinary in the mundane.
What do you think? What is the beautiful thing in your life can you focus on?
I have used this word to help my son and I get through our daily life. Because my son is 9 years old, to help him understand this concept more clearly, I have made up my own definition, which is as follows;
Equanimity is the relationship in your life between what is happening to you and what you are doing about it.
For instance, if the back of your hand itches and you scratch it, you are demonstrating equanimity.
Doing something about it, instead of whining and waiting for someone else to fix it.
You get out of life whatever you put into it.
So whatever you focus your attention on the most will define what kind of a life you end up with.
It’s imperative to make sure you decide what kind of a life you want, and then be determined to live it.
*I have learned that focusing on someone else’s faults, quirks, habits and misbehavior is counter productive and toxic to both of you. I strive to practice kindness because ultimately it will come back to serve everyone. Find balance and others will thank you for it.*
My family and I are determined to have a happy life together. No matter where we live, ultimately, we love each other by showing respect for one another. It’s a healthy cycle that defines our daily life and allows light and love into our home.
Although we have had some very challenging days (as if home-schooling weren’t enough, throw in the fact that we live in Brasil), overall our adventure here has been wonderfully full of friends and fun.
We are getting ready to move back to Michigan next Wednesday. We will spend our remaining time hanging out with our friends, eating our favorite Brasilian foods and marvelling at the beauty of this country. We will also be filling out paperwork, packing up the suitcases and cleaning the house. Busy, busy, busy!
Have you ever heard of this word before? Leave me a comment and let me know what you think! I look forward to your opinions!
Warning!!! This is NOT health food. This is only for people who love to eat. If you are on a diet, you won’t be by the time you finish eating this!
My girlfriend Egle made this cake for my mother-in-law, Diana, when she came to visit. We all had such a lovely time chatting and drinking coffee. It was one of the special memories I will always have about Brasil.
Thanks Egle and Diana.
Cake
6 eggs
6 Tablespoons sugar
8 Tablespoons powdered chocolate drink mix (Nestle’s Quick works well)
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 cup grated coconut
Put all ingredients into a blender and mix on High for 2-3 minutes. Pour into a greased bundt pan and bake at 350 degrees F for 30 minutes, or until a toothpick comes out clean.
Brigadeiro Topping
1 can sweetened condensed milk
4 Tablespoons powdered chocolate drink mix
2 Tablespoons butter
In a 2 quart saucepan, melt butter over medium heat. Stir in chocolate and then stir in condensed milk. Blend well and stir over medium heat until it becomes the consistency of caramel. Pour it over the cake and save whatever is left in a jar. Keep it in the fridge for up to 2 months.
Serve this cake warm with ice cream on the side.
Add a hot cup of coffee and you got yourself party!! Bon Appetite
If you are on a diet, you won’t be by the time you finish eating this!
